2009 animated crapRating: 8/20 (Abbey: 20/20; Emma: 16/20)
Plot: The government is keeping rubbery-looking monsters in a top-secret facility, including the recently giantized Susan Murphy who was hit by a meteorite a few days before her wedding. When aliens invade earth, the monsters are called upon to help save earth.
It's eight years after Monsters Inc., a movie with similar-looking characters and some humans, but these animators can't make characters that look any better. The monsters look rubbery, and the people move funny. This is really an ugly movie. The action sequences are nonsensical. There are all kinds of problems with the animation, proportional and continuity errors, that make it looked like they rushed through this thing or never got a chance to put the finishing touches on it. Toy Story's continuity errors you notice when you watch the movie dozens of times, but these stand out during the first (and last unless somebody decides to torture me) viewing. The soundtrack is so loud that it hurt my old man ears. The characters are cardboard, and there wasn't a single one I liked. Nope, not even the bad guys. The humor wasn't humorous. I'm actually having trouble thinking of anything at all that I liked about this movie. Oh, wait! They animated a nice butt on Susan. I'll give them credit for that. This is probably the worst Dreamworks movie I've seen, and I even saw Shark Tale. That this movie depressed me more than Dear Zachary says a whole lot.
This is definitely not a movie worth a back-and-forth battle, but I will say I think your 8 is too harsh (I give it a 13), and nothing is worse than "Shark Tale".
ReplyDeleteI have tried to forget 'Shark Tale' entirely. Yeah, that was a real piece of Ogre crap. What's your 'Shark Tale' rating?
ReplyDeleteProbably what you gave this, an 8. I could easily give it a 5 though, depending on my mood. It kind of pisses me off just thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteDreamworks seems to be trying to come up with a Dreamworks "style", in which everyone looks like those distubing pictures of distorted dogs. Everything is eyes and hair.
ReplyDeleteThis was not funny, clever, or interesting. Shrek was unique, since it was a kids movie with adult jokes peppered in. Then they decided to move from peppering to laying it on like concrete. Now, they are just a gumbo of veiled dick and unveiled fart jokes. Dreamworks has gone down in overall quality.
I do have hopes for "How to train your dragon". (Fool that I am)
I once made the mistake of ordering the gumbo of veiled dick at a Yat's.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a fan of the Shrek movies, by the way. My favorite Dreamworks movie was 'Over the Hedge'.
Favorite 3 Dreamworks Animated Films
ReplyDelete3. (TIE) Prince of Egypt/Madagascar 2
2. Over The Hedge
1. Kung Fu Panda
Favorite 3 Non Pixar - Modern Era Disney Animated films
3. The Rescuers Down Under
2. Hunchback of ND
1. Chicken Little
Favorite Voice Performances
3. Zach Braff - Chicken Little
2. Holly Hunter - Elasta Girl
1. Patrick Warburton - Too Numerous to Mention
And I'll have you know that gumbo of veiled dick is a family tradition.
ReplyDeleteChicken Little's good? Find the 'Beauty and the Beast' post (Cory disagrees with my 14/20 for what I think is an overrated Disney feature) for our conversation about Disney cartoons.
ReplyDeleteI've always liked Hanks and Allen as Woody and Buzz. And Ratzenberger in all those Pixar movies? Warburton's good, but it seems like I recognize his voice in every movie. I really liked Patton Oswalt as the rat in 'Ratatouille', Degeneres in 'Nemo', and Crispin Glover (America's finest actor) in 'Beowulf'...
Ah yes..Cory and Beauty and the Beast.....one of my favorite things to tease him about.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had read your review before this movie showed up in my Netflix. I could not believe how flat out BORING it was. Really nothing happens and you have giant people, aliens, and monsters...none of which is the least bit interesting.
I agree with your eight. YAY.
Barry, that comment actually made me laugh more than 'Zombieland'...there's something funny to me about you saying you would have trusted my review of this movie since we disagree about so many others.
ReplyDelete'Beauty and the Beast' was nominated for best picture! I think that's an argument he used. Does that automatically make 'Up' better, too? I saw 'Up' again today, by the way.
I thought Up was....okay. But its certainly not worthy of an Acadamy Award for best picture.
ReplyDeleteI thought that Beauty and the Beast was a 15.(on your scale)..at best. I did like it slightly better than Up. So that should please Cory.
Barry's jibes are no more incisive or effective than they were 20 years ago. "Up" was only nominated because they expanded to 10 nominees. It would not have been one of five, so the "B&tB" point (among very many) is still valid, as far as I'm concerned. You guys are just wrong, and as the bigger man, literally and figuratively, I accept your flaws and still like you, just the same.
ReplyDelete