Urine Couch AM Movie Club (The Lost Episodes): Matrix Revolutions

2003 trilogy conclusion

Rating: 6/20

Plot: I don't know. I never really could figure these movies out.

Here's the scoop, Betty Boop. This was mislabeled in the TV Guide, and I sat down on the Urine Couch expecting to see the middle movie of the Matrix trilogy--Matrix Retarded--but got this instead. And this might be one of the most boring movies ever made. At least the second movie, as bad as it is, has a pair of albinos in it. This one has a lot of talking, a bunch of flying, some lurking, a lot more talking, a gratuitous sex scene, a handful of scenes from the first movie, some seemingly endless third world country ritual party scene, and more talking. A lot of the special effects remind me of some of the science fiction stuff you can catch on cable television. I wonder if any fan of the first movie was really happy with the way this trilogy concluded. I've probably said it before, and I'll say it again: The two sequels of The Matrix managed to make me dislike The Matrix.

Full disclosure: I remember sitting down to watch this on the Urine Couch, but I can almost guarantee it led to me getting paid for a 2+ hour nap.

2 comments:

  1. One of the most disappointing movies I have ever watched in a theater. The second one did have some chase scenes and you mentioned the albinos, who were cool. This one was just a confusing mess that was so pathetically obviously trying to be both deep and cool. The entire rave scene is one of the dumbest moments in movie history. I agree about the special effects as well, especially the fight scenes. The original Matrix still comes across as believable and groundbreaking, while the last two movies are like a cheap video game. I'm still pissed nearly a decade later on how the Wojohoixsky whatever brothers threw away such a great premise on this drek.

    A six for me.

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  2. I just remember watching one of the matrix trilogies where Keanu punches back a hoard of men in black and they just keep coming. It was like the worst case of blue balls ever. No one died. No one won. They just got held at bay. It was probably the worst piece of cinema I ever encountered.

    The first matrix was ok, kind of a Philip K. Dick for dummies movie but when all the nerds loved it so friggin much I started hating it even more. Now it makes me ill. I should read yr review now.

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