War Machine

2017 Netflix original movie

Rating: 10/20

Plot: A gravelly-voiced alpha-male is put in charge of NATO forces in Afghanistan, but runs into some issues, especially when a Rolling Stone reporter gets involved.

And Netflix's streak of not releasing good films continues with this satirical war story that can't quite decide what it wants to be. Its ideas hollow and its humor flat, this is pretty much D.O.A. I hadn't heard that this was coming out, read a blurb from a critic I'm starting to lose all respect for, and got excited enough to check it out. It's a mess, it's poorly paced, and it's in desperate need to an editor. At best, it needs a trim. More likely, it needed tossed in the garbage and started again.

Brad Pitt doesn't help. I've never been convinced that the guy is a great actor anyway. When he's in just the right role, he works great. Here, you get the sense that he's only in this because George Clooney said no. He even looks a little Clooney-ish from certain angles here. He's nothing but a growling caricature here with inconsistent physical characteristics. He reminded me of Popeye at times, and after a while, I just started wishing I was watching a Popeye movie instead of War Machine. Even that Robert Altman one.

I did enjoy watching Brad Pitt run. Well, at least the first time. They milked that bit of physical comedy for all it was worth.

Full disclosure: I actually stopped paying attention to this movie at one point and had sex during it. What can I say? Popeye gets me going.