1984 Christmas movie
Rating: 5/20
Plot: All Simon wants for Christmas is for the kidnappers in Africa to let his parents come back home. After mailing a letter to Santa, he finds a way to sneak onto a plane headed for Norway (or whatever Scandinavian country this movie claims is where Santa lives) with a classmate and finds the jolly red elf and a fairy he hangs around with. He also has to survive a cannibalistic ogre.
I'm aware the dubbing doesn't help, but there's no excuse for the ridiculous plot of this family Christmas movie. Kidnapping? That cannibalistic ogre? A fairy? Santa battling crocodiles (or alligators) or engaging in trash-talk with monkeys?
I would rather not talk about the songs in this one. I had to take a hammer to my head immediately after the movie ended to chase them out of there.
A thrown dog to wake up children, the janitor character, elves who are just children with crappy ears. It's just what I asked Santa for!
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