Stuber

2019 action comedy

Rating: 8/20

Plot: An Uber driver picks up a tough cop and drives him around while he's trying to catch a bad guy.

Seeing this isn't one of my better recent decisions. I think a computer could have been programmed to write this movie. It's as predictable as movie comedies get. A computer could not have screamed every single one of his lines like Kumail Nanjiani did though. Nanjiani's got a bit of charm, but his strategy of screaming everything didn't succeed in making his lines any funnier. Dave Bautista has the screen charisma of the monolith in 2001, or maybe he has a little less. I was annoyed with him because he said he'd never be in a Fast & Furious movie because he only wants to be in "good movies," but I'm going to forgive him after checking his Twitter account and finding out that he's an outspoken anti-Trumper. Still, if this is his idea of a "good movie," he's probably taken a few too many shots to the head with a metal chair.

Not a single laugh. I know because I counted.

Full confession: After a first week back at school, I was really tired and kept dozing off during the movie. Nanjiani was doing his part--screaming every single one of his lines--to keep me awake though.