The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

1974 comedy

Rating: 12/20

Plot: Following the death of Scooby Doo (worms, in case you're wondering), the rest of the gang (Daphne, Shaggy, Charles, Velma, and Smitty) take a trip in the Mystery Machine to the absolute worst part of Texas to visit the home of the grandfather of two of them. They pick up a hitchhiking lunatic, and things get ominous. After they run out of gas (of course), they're forced to stay the night at (get this!) the grandfather's house they were going to stay at to begin with! Unfortunately, the neighbors are a family of mentally-challenged cannibals, and most of the gang are chopped up or slaughtered in an equally gruesome manner before they can pull off one of the cannibal's masks and say, "Mr. Withers! It was you all along!"

This thing's manic. I remember hearing about this as a kid and being scared of the thing. It was banned! It was based on a true story! It was in a special part of the video store, and we couldn't even check it out! It was the bloodiest movie ever made! It ends up being surprisingly tame, although it is pretty psychologically gruesome, and mostly an experience that is bizarre more than it is terrifying. Tobe Hooper is very good with sound and with tight, almost claustrophobic shots that create some suspenseful moments. He does a lot with probably almost no time and money. Predictably, the story is dopey and the acting and character motivation are ridiculously bad. The exposition stretches pretty thin and barely makes sense anyway, and the scene with the chainsaw-wielding maniac chasing the girl through the woods that goes on for about thirty-five minutes too long. I laughed more than I was frightened, but I'm not so sure that wasn't the original intent anyway. The dinner scene near the end is funnier than anything in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. The biggest fault of this is that it is so influential because, unfortunately, it inspired filmmakers to make really crappy horror movies with nearly identical plots. I do realize that my rating of 12/20 is at the same time too kind and too critical for a movie that is simultaneously really junky and really original.

Terrified:

5 comments:

  1. I kind of looked on this as required viewing because it was so influential, but tried to put it off as long as I could. I agree with most of what you say, except that I found no humor at all. It is just depressing considering what humans are capable of, and that this sort of thing is "entertainment" that spawned an even more repulsive industry of slasher films. I guess it gets the adrenaline(?) flowing and is an excuse for the girl to grab her dates' arm, but this is depressing.

    The chase scene is very intense, and the film is shocking, but it lacks villians that have style or intelligence. They are just nuts and very bizarre. There are many incredibly effective moments (Leatherface's sudden appearances, Grandpa sucking her finger), and it is very well done for its budget and originality, but it makes me ashamed to get any enjoyment from it. The table scene is just horrible to watch.

    I would have given this a higher grade if it were based on fact, but the film is very disengenuous(?) by making it seem that it is based on a true story. Ed Gein robbed graves and killed two women years apart. This story is completely made up by really sick minds. An objective 13 for this landmark horror film, but an 8 for my tastes.

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  2. Not really my type of movie, but I too felt the need to see it.

    "The story is completely made up by sick minds." That's how I felt when I watched 'Sleepless in Seattle'...

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  3. Two days ago, a co-worker mentioned "Sleepless..." when listing her top-ten favorite movies.

    If it had been a guy, I would have been forced to shoot him like a rabid dog.

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  4. Where's 'Sleepless' in your top 500?

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  5. I forgot to respond to this. I liked "Sleepless..." enough to give it about a 15, so it might make my top-1000 (if I had one). I'm in touch with my feminine side just fine.

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