Shazam!

2019 superhero movie

Rating: 12/20

Plot: An origin story for Shazam, a new Avenger.

This is a Christmas movie. It's also an 80's movie.

During the opening scenes, there's a scary car accident while a child rambles about these creepy 7 Deadly Sins sculptures with glowing red eyes and a kid who gets separated from his mother at an amusement park and subsequently orphaned. DC is bringing that artificial movie darkness that I associate with its movies, I thought. Fortunately, things eased up, and this became a kind of PG-13 Deadpool, heavy on humor with plenty of winking though there's no character here who breaks the fourth wall quite like Deadpool. Not all of the jokes land, but that's pretty much what keeps this thing floating when the numerous narrative strands always threaten to sink it. An emotional payoff at the end during your typical wildly frenetic action sequence didn't feel earned, mostly because it involved far too many characters, most who weren't really characters the movie had bothered with actually creating. This also irritated me by leaning too heavily on a mishmash of superhero cliches--character relationships, the villain's motivation--but it at least has as much originality as a superhero origin story can have with the creative ways the story has this kid and his sidekick, the other kid, discover the hero's powers. Too often, however, it stumbles around, seemingly unable to find one voice. With the shocking violence and the scares provided by those 7 Deadly Sins monsters and the cartoonish visual humor, it seems like a movie that wants to both have its fun and bludgeon it, too.

Those bullies--they should have gotten that kid who played Butch the Bully in the Cool Cat Saves the Kid movie. It would have been almost as realistic.

Another Year

2010 movie

Rating: 15/20

Plot: A year in the life of a married old couple who are happy despite their circle of friends and acquaintances being completely miserable.

My favorite thing about a Mike Leigh movie is that I'm never sure whether I'm supposed to feel happy or sad while watching them. It might depend on the context of the viewer and what characters, lines, or situations that viewer latches onto. The clash between the happily married couple that is the nucleus for all these other characters and the collective of miserable friends who surrounds them manages to intensify the moods. Tom and Gerri (ha!), the couple played by Jim Broadbent and Ruth Sheen seem even happier contrasted with the pained giggling of Lesley Manville's brand of manic depression, Peter Wight's character who might be a heart attack waiting to happen, and Tom's recently-widowed brother. And those characters' funks are darker in the light of Tom and Gerri's marriage. It's not that this is a major downer through and through or anything because the relationship of Tom and Gerri's son and his girlfriend gives plenty of hope.

The film's structured using four seasons in one year, probably a good choice by Leigh since that's exactly how many seasons a year has. The couple interacts with various friends with Manville, I believe, being the only recurring acquaintance. It's unclear to me whether "spring" or "winter" or whatever have themes or happenings that are especially springy or wintery. I'd probably have to put more thought into that. There's a burgeoning romance. There's a new car. There's a death. Hmm. Maybe there's something smarter about these seasons than what I noticed the first time.

Leigh's dialogue-driven character development is natural. Nothing revolutionary is going on here, and it seems like the sort of movie you'd see all the time. Still, it has this unique flavor. Both the humor and pathos work, creating the kind of movie you almost want to hug.

Terrific final shot, one that leans on the acting of one of these performers.

35 Shots of Rum

2008 movie

Rating: 15/20

Plot: No time for a plot synopsis at this time. I apologize for the inconvenience.

I had never seen a Claire Denis movie before but have an interest in her new one, a movie that puts Juliette Binoche in space. I really want to see if she's capable of acting without gravity and oxygen. So I figured I'd watching an earlier Denis film to get a feel for what she does.

What she does isn't much like how other filmmakers would cover the same types of subject matter, and it's a little jarring. It took me a long time to feel this movie's rhythms, but if Denis's other movies are like this, I think I'll end up appreciating what she does more and more. She throws these characters at us with little or no exposition and gives us a slice-of-life glimpse into their lives. This movie is so quiet, and on the surface, there's no real drama. At least there's no big movie drama going on. Below that surface, however, there are all these tiny earthquakes.

Barney's Version

2010 Canadian movie

Rating:15/20

Plot: About three decades of Barney's life as he marries three times and possibly murders somebody.

This might be the best I've seen Paul Giamatti even though he depends a little too much on grunting and various purring noises. That seems to be his deal. But there's a moment in this where he bursts into laughter that might be his best moment ever although I also like a great freak-out he has in this and a scene where he tries to peel a banana.

I just looked up what "boychik" means. My son is going into the Navy, and I'm proud of him. He tested really well (99th percentile) and is likely going to train to be a Navy beekeeper. At some point, I'm going to tell him, "Nice work, boychik." Can I say that to my son if I'm not Jewish?

Dustin Hoffman seems to still be trying in 2010 even though Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium had convinced me otherwise. He's best here at a dinner party where he clashes with one of Barney's wife's parents. Not understanding the word "gratuitously" and complimenting chicken both made me smile.

Lots made me smile in this tragic comedy actually. It's a story loosely told, one that bounces between time periods to tie in this halfassed murder mystery element. Barney's a flawed human being who you almost want to root for. At the very least, you really hope that he doesn't accidentally shoot himself in the leg with a gun he doesn't seem to know how to use. Sure, you're going to wonder how Paul Giamatti manages to seduce any woman, let alone Rachelle Lefevre, Minnie Driver, and Rosamund Pike, the latter who I didn't even know I was in love with until I saw her in that dress at the same time Giamatti's character did. The episodic nature skims along the surface of this character's life, and although it does feel like some of the individual episodes don't really complete, it does create a mosaic succeeding in helping the viewer understand and appreciate this guy and the flaws that make up who he is.

You know, I just thought about that scene where Dustin Hoffman is dancing on bubble wrap in Mr. Magorium and feel the need to apologize to both him and his fans. The guy's a prick though, so I'm not going to bother.

Never Let Me Go

2010 sci-fi romance

Rating: 14/20

Plot: I don't feel like typing a plot synopsis out. I'm sorry.

Alex Garland wrote the screenplay based on a Kazuo Ishiguro novel. I think what I like about it is that nothing is explained to the audience. The movie throws you into this parallel dystopian world where the rules are very unclear. It creates a mysterious vibe where the audience knows just a little less than the characters who inhabit this world. The tone is stiff, not unlike a Yorgos Lanthimos movie.

Thematically, I'm not sure what to make about the whole thing. There's a lot of "soul" business in this, and there's a lot of dialogue that points to themes about "what it means to be human" or some philosophical bullshit like that. All sorts of clues are peppered in where these characters, especially when they're young, are just kind of playing at being human beings.

I liked the cast a lot. Andrew Garfield is jittery, and when he has to unleash a primal scream, he unleashes one hell of one. Kiera Knightley has this subtle rage or modicum of cruelty that she seems to wear on her face. Carey Mulligan is really good as the third member of this love triangle, her strength and despair so quietly delivered.

I don't know the director Mark Romanek and had to look him up. I guess I've seen every film he's ever made since he disowned his debut. It's just this and One Hour Photo, I guess. He makes a lot of music videos because apparently people still make those. There were some great shots in this of things like statues being rained on.

Sally Hawkins is in this.

Who Killed Captain Alex?

2010 Ugandan action movie

Rating: 4/20

Plot: Captain Alex leads an elite squad to take down the Tiger Mafia. That is, until he's killed. After that, his brother--the Ugandan Bruce Lee--gets involved. Action movie!

I've seen a lot of movies in the more-than-a-decade I've written about movies, but I've not seen anything like this Ugandan action movie. As an ultra-low-budget action movie with barely any plot at all, this is nothing new. There are some Birdemic-esque special effects with blood spurts and some helicopter, a helicopter that at one point even flies backwards. There's a ridiculous training montage. There's the Ugandan Bruce Lee (Bruce U, according to our excited narrator [more on him in a bit]), and as a matter of fact, everybody in Uganda seems to know kung fu. There's some terrifically awful music choices, all lifted from elsewhere and including this recurring karaoke version of Seal's "Kiss from a Rose," never used in what you'd say is an appropriate way. I mean, if there is an appropriate way to use a karaoke version of Seal's "Kiss from a Rose" in an action movie.

What makes this memorable is the use of V.J. Emmie, a friend of the director who narrates as a "video joker" in order to help translate the movie for English-speaking audiences and provide some commentary. He interrupts the action frequently, laughs or throws in a "Mamma mia!" when people get shot, reminds us all that this is indeed a movie (including one moment when he just repeats the word "Movie!" over and over again during one action sequence), reminds us that the good guy characters are commandos by saying "Commandos!" over and over, makes fun of the actions, makes cracks about eating German people, occasionally provides his own sound effects, lets us know when there's a "supa kicker" or a "supa rider" onscreen, makes a plea for us all to see another movie called Bad Black, calls a bunch of birds "dinosaurs," invents a new euphemism for sexual intercourse ("beat the rat serious"), turns the thing into a damn musical at one point, and praising the Tiger Mafia's choice in panties. He's awesome, and I'd love him to record Video Joker commentary for any Marvel movie I'm about to watch.

The best-worst actor in this thing is Sserunay Ernest whose best moment is when he destroys a television while crying.

Action movie!

I'll have to check out more in Nabwana I.G.G.'s filmography sometime even though it's the kind of movie that makes me feel like less of a man. This, by the way, almost doesn't exist at all as he had to erase the original movie from his computer in order to make the follow-up. This movie was made for two hundred dollars, and you really have to admit that Nabwana I.G.G. managed to do a lot with what it currently costs to see a movie and buy popcorn and a cola.

The Kids Are All Right

2010 dramedy

Rating: 15/20

Plot: Two siblings with lesbian parents decide to meet the sperm daughter who made that happen.

This is a slice of a life middle America is unlikely to connect with here, but the relationships feel authentic. Nothing's spelled out with them, the performers doing a good job of letting the characters' pasts and even futures manifest naturally. When this movie's funny, it's funny in a natural way; likewise, when this movie gets sad, it happens naturally.

I enjoyed the dialogue--explanations of Scrabble plays (enough Scrabble in this movie to make me think it's product placement), discussions about whether or not a dog's head should be peed upon, etc.

During most of Mark Ruffalo's scenes, he's fidgeting or eating something. It seems as if he thought that would give the character some personality. "Let me try that scene again, but this time, I'll try it while eating a stick of celery." It worked for me, and if I were a lesbian, I'd likely want to have sex with him. I mean, he does have a motorcycle and all.

I believe it would take me another watch to really figure out what this movie is saying with these relationships and their shifting dynamics.

The Town

2010 crime movie

Rating: 12/20

Plot: A bank-robbin' crew runs into some issues after their leader falls for a gal whom they kidnapped following a job. The authorities are also onto them, so things aren't looking good.

Both generic and preposterous, The Town really succeeds only in reminding me that movies that take place in Boston usually irritate me. Part of it is because I don't like hearing people talk about the Red Sox. Ben Affleck directed this and made sure to give himself sex scenes with two different women. Congratulations on that, Ben Affleck. Celebrate with a tattoo.

One beautiful shot of one of the crew in a nun mask made me laugh and probably made watching this long movie worth it. It was the perfect expression or whatever the heck was going on.

The Man Who Killed Don Quixote

2019 long-awaited movie

Rating: 10/20

Plot: A director returns to the area where he filmed a version of Don Quixote during grad school and loses track of what's real and what's fantasy when he meets up with some familiar faces.

Credit the location scout for most of what's good about this long-awaited Gilliam supposed-to-be masterpiece although Adam Driver doing a Nicolas Cage thing almost works and Jonathan Pryce is really good in the titular role--the Cervantes character, not the man who killed him. This is Gilliam at his sloppiest, and while a Gilliam treatise on creativity and muses that bounces between reality and fantasy without warning looks great on paper, this was confusing and didn't honestly a little boring. It felt patched together, the product of thirty years of frustrating stops and starts. The latter, of course, makes sense.

I really really wanted to like this movie, especially while watching a "making-of" deal following the film, interview and behind-the-scenes snippets that made everybody involved just seem so enthusiastic about what they were doing.

A climactic party scene has a kind of chaotic energy that shows Gilliam might still have something in the tank. I also enjoyed shots from the film-within-the-film representing the earlier work of Adam Driver's character.

Rabbit Hole

2010 drama

Rating: 12/20

Plot: A grieving couple demonstrates questionable decision-making skills following the loss of a child.

"So somewhere out there I'm making pancakes? Or at a water park?"

In some ways, this is heavily-written John Cameron Mitchell drama adapted from a David Lindsay-Abaire has some nice subtle touches, but the goofier, more obvious moments kind of stomp all over those. Nicole Kidman isn't her best here, and neither is Aaron Eckhart, mostly because they're required to act so much. It's a lot of acting.

I did laugh once. There's a moment when a character laughs inappropriately after somebody says "Hi, guys. My daughter died of leukemia," and I laughed right along with him.

Fruit Roll Up product placement.

Humpday

2009 comedy

Rating: 14/20

Plot: Longtime wannabe beatnik pal Andrew pops in for a visit to Ben and his wife, and they decide to make a work of art together. 

I said a long time ago that I wouldn't stop until I saw Mark Duplass without his shirt on! Now, it's time to consider stopping. 

My favorite moment that didn't involve Duplass with his shirt off was Joshua Leonard giving a random high five to a random kid. That's what I'm likely to remember from this movie. 

I liked this movie's mature approach to the subjects of friendship and the frustration of not reaching dreams you don't really even understand. 

The Beach Bum

2019 Harmony Korine movie

Rating: 9/20

Plot: A slacker poet has a series of misadventures in the southern parts of Florida around the time his daughter gets married.

The love/hate relationship--more like a like/eye-roll relationship, to be honest--with giggling avant-manchild Harmony Korine continues with this, something like a mash-up of Trash Humpers and Spring Breakers. It's glossy, it's got some star power, and it shares Spring Breakers' cinematographer, Benoit Debie. At the same time, it drifts as aimlessly as Trash Humpers and shares its juvenile humor. It's predictable in its spontaneity, a movie that's got a single note and plays it over and over like a child with one of those toy xylophones banging the red one over and over again because it's his favorite color. The film's virtually plotless, but it doesn't really do much to create a well-rounded central character either. By the time a "point" to the whole thing emerges, you realize that it's what you figured it would be when you walked it to the theater and that it's really shallow and silly. Harmony Korine, it seems, hasn't evolved intellectually since his senior year in high school.

McConaughey seems like he's having more fun than I did. The performance is better than the movie it tries to carry, and it's hard to imagine anybody else doing what McConaughey is doing here. Snoop Dogg and Jimmy Buffett also make an appearance, and I have doubts that the former even realized he was in a movie. My favorite character Moondog runs into might be Martin Lawrence's Captain Wack unless it's Phil and the gang of homeless.

I've lost faith in Harmony Korine again. Fool me once, Korine, same on you. Fool me all the other times--also shame on you. Do something better than this with your oddball creative energy. This is as silly as those really bad parody movies.

Mother

2009 dark dramedy

Rating: 16/20

Plot: When her son is arrested for a murder he later confesses to have committed, a mother tries to find the real killer and free him.

You're definitely a helicopter parent when you feed your grown son some sort of broth while he's taking a leak outside on a wall at a bus stop.

With bookended dance sequences, characters saying random words like "spaghetti" or "armadillo" during a sex scene, the purchase of an umbrella, spinning poop, a lawyer's buffet strategy, and a phallic golf driver, this is easily my favorite Bong Joon-Ho movie. It's got a quietly manic pace, some lovely shots (including the aforementioned opening dance sequence with the titular mother and a transition from the mother and son sleeping to a shot of the body), some offbeat humor, and a genuine mystery that keeps you intrigued for the duration. It also keeps you guessing. You truly never know where this is going next.

After disliking a few Bong Joon-Ho movies and not really loving any, as well as just coming off another bad South Korean movie, I was reluctant to give this a chance, but I'm really glad I did.

Blue Valentine

2010 love story (at least according to the poster)

Rating: 14/20

Plot: A love story.

A bit disappointed that the Tom Waits' song wasn't used here, but Ryan Gosling (or whichever Ryan this is) almost made up for that with his Tiny Tim impressions. There's a lovely moment where he sings "You Always Hurt the One You Love" (which I know thanks to the Spike Jones version) and plays the ukulele while Michelle Williams kind of tap dances. There's another important song used in this, and the rest are taken care of by Grizzly Bear. I think it's the artist Grizzly Bear, not an actual grizzly bear.

This is a tough one to watch as director Derek Cianfrance (whom I do not know) weaves together an almost idyllic courtship between these love birds and what appears to be the end of their marriage about six or seven years later. It's particularly painful because you understand why they appealed to each other and develop a fondness for the idea of the two together. He's got a kind heart and looks like a movie star. She's really smart, and just like the man falling for her, the audience gets to see exactly what she looks like naked, too. So the developing of this romance feels right, natural albeit natural in a fairy-tale sorta way.

That's why the other side of this relationship coin is so painful. The juxtapositions are striking, almost to the point where it seems like it's Michelle Williams and whichever Ryan this is playing a separate couple or something. There's almost no context for the disintegration of this relationship. Both the development of the relationship and really its demise start in medias res, so we don't really know whether he's to blame or she's to blame or whether both are equally at fault here. There are hints here and there, but there's nothing concrete, leading at least this viewer to wonder if a final straw really made that much sense.

Ryan Gosling has a "Giving Tree" tattoo in this. I think that might be a major clue.

As much as I liked that song and dance number mentioned above, my favorite scene is earlier when Gosling performs a kind gesture for a character who isn't all that significant to the story, one that has the type of music you'd expect to accompany a kind gesture in an indie movie. That didn't stop it from touching me, however.

The Ghost Writer

2010 thriller

Rating: 14/20

Plot: After one ghost writer dies, another writer is hired to finish up the memoirs of a former English prime minister. While working on the project, controversy about that prime minister's legacy comes out, and the writer finds himself in for more than he bargained for.

This doesn't feel that much different than your typical Hollywood thriller, but Polanski does know how to direct a suspenseful scene. I liked almost all of the main performances here, especially Pierce Brosnan's, but three things really stood out to make this worth watching.

1) Eli Wallach's brief performance as "old man who has been around for a long time"
2) All the shots of the perpetually-sweeping guy right outside the home Brosnan's characer was i
3) Alexandre Desplait's score

I kept expecting Ewan McGregor's head to catch fire when he was riding that bicycle around on the beach.