Aborted Film Series #12: Joe Dirt


2001 comedy

Rating: n/r

Plot: I did not last long enough to figure out what this movie was about. From the poster, I can ascertain that it's about a mulleted guy with a mop.

Let me explain why I even tried to watch this movie after missing it the first time it came around when I was apparently a lot smarter. Joe Dirt 2: Beautiful Loser, in case you haven't heard, has been released to the masses through Crackle or some free entertainment outlet like Crackle. No, I don't need to see every movie that winds up getting a sequel that nobody on earth asked for--well, nobody but David Spade--but I found out the plot of this second installment of the Dirt saga involves time travel. But I'm not going to watch Joe Dirt 2: Beautiful Loser without first watching Joe Dirt, am I? That would be insanity! So: Joe Dirt.

I made it three minutes and forty-two seconds, right around the time Dennis Miller appeared on my screen. David Spade can't act, and I couldn't even tell if some of this was supposed to be funny. I could not waste any more of my life on Joe Dirt, and the timey-wimey sequel will just be missing from my world-renowned Time Travel Movie Fest. But I'm not a completist anyway.

Because I was curious, I did some half-assed research to see how many movies I've not been able to finish since I started this blog. I didn't think it was very many. Here's the list: Howard the Duck, Here Comes the Boom (not really my fault), Shrek 3, If You Don't Stop It. . .You'll Go Blind, Sharknado, Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure (didn't even get to a balloon), Iron Sky, Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman, Trail of the Screaming Forehead, Renaissance: 2054, and I Am a Sex Addict (a movie that Netflix wouldn't let me finish).

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