Showing posts with label western. Show all posts
Showing posts with label western. Show all posts
Lemonade Joe
1964 Czech Western musical parody
Rating: 16/20
Plot: The titular sharpshooter tries to rid a sinful town called Stetson City of whisky in the 1880s.
The good guys wear white and refuse libations while the bad guys wear black and are actually named Badman. With 1920's color tinting and slapstick, way too many songs, ridiculous fight scenes that are speeded-up, and stock characters, this both pokes fun and pays homage to Western musical comedies. It also nails capitalism as Joe seems to exist only to shill lemonade that has a name suspiciously close to Coca-Cola. Kolaloka? That's close, right? There's plenty of silliness here--a trumpeter in black face who engages in a shoot-out with the good guy in what might be the best shoot-out I ever see, a trickster bad guy named Hogofogo who probably gets the best song, a guy who eats violins, and lines like "The night is cold; I'll need to put on my woolens" preceding a climactic trip to a place called Dead Man's Valley. The hijinks make this really entertaining even though it seems to go on a little too long, and although all the parts of this remind you of things you've seen before, it all comes together uniquely and isn't really like anything you've seen before. This is the best Czech Western I've seen and much better than Blazing Saddles despite the lack of Gene Wilder. Fun stuff!
Shane Watches the Greatest Movies Ever Made: The Searchers
1956 cowboy and Indian movie
Rating: 19/20
Plot: A confederate soldier returns home after the Civil War and shows everybody how to piss. When some damn Indians kill some of his family and kidnap his niece, he forms a posse--the titular searchers. His real motive, however, is to get back a doll that belonged to his niece but that he may have been having sexual relations with. The Duke! Meanwhile, there's a guy with a rocking chair fetish.
"What makes a man to wander? What makes a man to roam?" These dopey theme songs for Westerns always make me feel nostalgic. At first, I'm thinking, "This is really stupid," but by the middle of the song, I'm on board, ready to get myself a horse and a spittoon. There might be too much music in this movie. I mean, I really want it during all the ride-around montages. Monument Valley doesn't exactly need music, but it compliments the searching well. I definitely don't need music when the characters are having supper. I can figure out supper without music.
John Wayne's character is big and complex. He's hard not to like even when he's at his most despicable. He's really a villain here, but at the same time, he's a war hero and a loving family man. Well, and he's a racist, the kind of guy who'll shoot out a dead Injun's eyes just for spite. And he calls his friends things like "Blanket Head" or "Chunk Head" which doesn't seem very nice. The movie centers on his obsession when it's not focusing on Mose's obsession with rocking chairs, and although it's easy to say that his character is just racist or pissed off that his side lost the big war, it's really more complex than that. Wayne's performance, simple on the surface, and the ambiguity with his character gives this movie a complexity and along with Ford's visual brilliance and the beauty of Monument Valley, it helps elevate the Western to an art form.
Was Buddy Holly a fan of this movie? Wayne's recurring "That'll be the day" catchphrase is cool, but I really liked his "Put an amen to it!" better. Can't tell you how many times I've wanted to yell that in church. My favorite line might be when Ethan says, "A man rides a horse until it dies. Then he goes on afoot. A Comanche comes along, gets that horse up, and rides it twenty more miles. Then, he eats it." I think I read that in a history book when I was in sixth grade actually. Oh, and I like the exchange after the Futterman ambush:
"What if you'd missed?"
"Never occurred to me."
That is so cool. The dialogue's good and more than likely authentic. What I don't understand is the voice of Charlie played by Ken Curtis. I took a linguistics class in college, but it doesn't help me understand how people, in just a few generations, can lose a British accent and talk like Mose and Charlie do in this movie. They're around for comic relief, and the comic relief doesn't work perfectly all the time. John Wayne's lines are often funny, but a goofy fight between Marin and Charlie, Mose and his rocking chairs, and especially the inept Northerners who ruin some of the tension in the final moments, do a lot more harm than good.
My favorite character just might be Ward Bond's Reverend Captain Samuel Johnston Clayton. During a terrific scene where the posse is surrounded, I could have sworn he said, "I want you to move out here like Baby Jesus," but I could have just been confused.
Oh, wait a second! He's not my favorite character. I forgot that this movie's got a log lady!
Another quick question: As beautiful as this setting is--especially filmed by Ford with its yellow dusk, gnarled foliage at an inexplicable swamp, and the Dali-esque landscape--why would anybody want to live there?
This movie's got arguably one of the best closing shots of all time, but I'm not going to write about it.
Rating: 19/20
Plot: A confederate soldier returns home after the Civil War and shows everybody how to piss. When some damn Indians kill some of his family and kidnap his niece, he forms a posse--the titular searchers. His real motive, however, is to get back a doll that belonged to his niece but that he may have been having sexual relations with. The Duke! Meanwhile, there's a guy with a rocking chair fetish.
"What makes a man to wander? What makes a man to roam?" These dopey theme songs for Westerns always make me feel nostalgic. At first, I'm thinking, "This is really stupid," but by the middle of the song, I'm on board, ready to get myself a horse and a spittoon. There might be too much music in this movie. I mean, I really want it during all the ride-around montages. Monument Valley doesn't exactly need music, but it compliments the searching well. I definitely don't need music when the characters are having supper. I can figure out supper without music.
John Wayne's character is big and complex. He's hard not to like even when he's at his most despicable. He's really a villain here, but at the same time, he's a war hero and a loving family man. Well, and he's a racist, the kind of guy who'll shoot out a dead Injun's eyes just for spite. And he calls his friends things like "Blanket Head" or "Chunk Head" which doesn't seem very nice. The movie centers on his obsession when it's not focusing on Mose's obsession with rocking chairs, and although it's easy to say that his character is just racist or pissed off that his side lost the big war, it's really more complex than that. Wayne's performance, simple on the surface, and the ambiguity with his character gives this movie a complexity and along with Ford's visual brilliance and the beauty of Monument Valley, it helps elevate the Western to an art form.
Was Buddy Holly a fan of this movie? Wayne's recurring "That'll be the day" catchphrase is cool, but I really liked his "Put an amen to it!" better. Can't tell you how many times I've wanted to yell that in church. My favorite line might be when Ethan says, "A man rides a horse until it dies. Then he goes on afoot. A Comanche comes along, gets that horse up, and rides it twenty more miles. Then, he eats it." I think I read that in a history book when I was in sixth grade actually. Oh, and I like the exchange after the Futterman ambush:
"What if you'd missed?"
"Never occurred to me."
That is so cool. The dialogue's good and more than likely authentic. What I don't understand is the voice of Charlie played by Ken Curtis. I took a linguistics class in college, but it doesn't help me understand how people, in just a few generations, can lose a British accent and talk like Mose and Charlie do in this movie. They're around for comic relief, and the comic relief doesn't work perfectly all the time. John Wayne's lines are often funny, but a goofy fight between Marin and Charlie, Mose and his rocking chairs, and especially the inept Northerners who ruin some of the tension in the final moments, do a lot more harm than good.
My favorite character just might be Ward Bond's Reverend Captain Samuel Johnston Clayton. During a terrific scene where the posse is surrounded, I could have sworn he said, "I want you to move out here like Baby Jesus," but I could have just been confused.
Oh, wait a second! He's not my favorite character. I forgot that this movie's got a log lady!
Another quick question: As beautiful as this setting is--especially filmed by Ford with its yellow dusk, gnarled foliage at an inexplicable swamp, and the Dali-esque landscape--why would anybody want to live there?
This movie's got arguably one of the best closing shots of all time, but I'm not going to write about it.
Stingray Sam
2009 serialized science fiction western musical
Rating: 14/20
Plot: The titular hero and his sidekick, The Quasar Kid, have to earn their freedom by saving the daughter of a carpenter from Fredward, the ruler of a wealthy planet.
It's just a tad over an hour, and that's with having to hear the theme song six times and get opening and closing credits for each installment. This is from the creative mind of Cory McAbee who made The American Astronaut, another musical space-western that I loved. Unfortunately, McAbee didn't have the money to make his Werewolf Hunters of the Midwest which I'm sure would be a blockbuster, so he made this instead. Like Astronaut this is inspired and playful with a cuddly lunacy. McAbee squeezes everything he can from every penny he's got to make these things which, if my math was correct, must have been around 25 pennies for this one. This doesn't have the set design of Astronaut, but there's enough quirkiness to last you a month or two and the songs are catchy and clever. The songs are once again played by the Billy Nayer Show which Wikipedia describes as being a "musical group of questionable genre." Each installment gets a song, and almost making up for the lack of nifty sets and the atmospherics that Astronaut had, there are these little animated sequences in each installment to give background for the story. Those, like the rest of this, are narrated by the recognizable voice of David Hyde Pierce. There's not a lot that is traditional about Cory McAbee--he doesn't look like a leading man, his stories are too weird to work for the mainstream, and he makes science ficion western musicals. But the guy is just bursting with ideas, and if I was a big-shot Hollywood producer, I'd give him all the pennies he needs to put his vision on the big screen.
Note: McAbee's daughter, Willa Vy McAbee, plays the daughter in this. She's also in McAbee's 2012 production, Crazy and Thief, with her brother. That movie doesn't seem to be available anywhere.
Shane Watches a Bad Movie with Friends on Facebook: Big Money Rustlas
2010 Insane Clown Posse western comedy
Rating: 5/20 (Fred [simul-watching on Facebook]: 7/20)
Plot: There's no peace in Mudbug as Big Baby Chips. . .oh, nevermind.
Over the poker table, Fred and I decided we would watch this on February 19th at 9:30. He might have been a little drunk. I had no excuse. I told other Facebook friends to participate, but they weren't interested, probably because it's a comedy-western hybrid made by the Insane Clown Posse. Well, except for Josh who finished the movie an hour before we were supposed to watch it because he's got a bedtime. I'm not sure what to write about this movie, so I'm just going to use the Facebook conversation:
Rating: 5/20 (Fred [simul-watching on Facebook]: 7/20)
Plot: There's no peace in Mudbug as Big Baby Chips. . .oh, nevermind.
Over the poker table, Fred and I decided we would watch this on February 19th at 9:30. He might have been a little drunk. I had no excuse. I told other Facebook friends to participate, but they weren't interested, probably because it's a comedy-western hybrid made by the Insane Clown Posse. Well, except for Josh who finished the movie an hour before we were supposed to watch it because he's got a bedtime. I'm not sure what to write about this movie, so I'm just going to use the Facebook conversation:
- Shane Brashear Great close-up of a horse's rear end...probably the most pleasant thing about the movie so far.
- Shane Brashear I really hope this movie never explains why two of the characters are wearing clown make-up. It adds a mysterious flavor, kind of like a classic spaghetti western or 'The Searchers'.
- Shane Brashear acid from a goldmine? Fat chick's ass after running a marathon in no underwear? This is pretty poetic stuff...
- Shane Brashear Yeah, I guess that's the conflict...though my guess is that they'll end up teaming up.
- Shane Brashear Hatchet Man is one of their characters or alter-egos or something. I feel like I should have done a little research or something.
- Shane Brashear I like the old sheriff...great facial hair and the voice of a 70's cartoon character.
- Shane Brashear "You got my money, motherfucker?" and crazed giggling as I gather my chips...expect that next poker night.
- Shane Brashear I need subtitles for the guy in the burgundy jacket...the one originally swinging that hammer.
- Carrie Dobbins I'm so sorry I have missed this momentous occasion. :( I had every intention of participating, but then I took 30 ml of NyQuil chased by a beer and promptly passed out. I now drag myself to bed. Excuses, I know, but a pretty good one...:(
- Shane Brashear Erwin Shepansky plays the old sheriff--Fred Freckles. Unfortunately, this has been his only movie appearance.
- Shane Brashear Well, the dude who shoots lasers out of his eyes and makes outhouses explode didn't work out. Time to send in the guy with a smelly foot.
- Shane Brashear Just looked up Sizemore's filmography...this must have been a good career move because he has 20 (!) movies either completed, filming, or in pre- or post-production.
- Fred Milch I'd like to take this moment to comment on my disappointment in the lack of nudity in this film.
- Shane Brashear I doubt I'll be able to get this "Wouldn't let his pecker near my butt" song out of my head tomorrow.
- Shane Brashear "I can't wait to pee on your head." If I had a nickel for every time I said that, I could take that 45 cents and make my own movie.
- Shane Brashear That showdown reminded me of the one in 'The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly'...well, they're both in color.
- Fred Milch A solid 7 out of 20. This is what I'd call a good Bad Movie.
I rate movies on a 4-tiered scale.
Good-Good movies (something that strives for greatness and attains it, such as The Godfather)
Bad-Good Movies (the lowest of the low.)
Good-Bad Movies (Amazing cinema. Big Trouble in Little China being a perfect example.)
Bad-Bad Movies (Think Scary Movie, or anything with Little Richard in it) - Fred Milch it's clearly at the low end of the Good-Bad tier, but it's acceptable. I'm actually pleasantly surprised that I could finish it. It was entertaining in it's horridity.
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