The Palm Beach Story

1942 romantic comedy

Rating: 16/20 (Jen: 14/20)

Plot: Life after Tom and Gerry's marriage has not quite been happily ever after. They're struggling financially and about to lose their apartment. Luckily, a hard-of-hearing Wienie King, gives Gerry seven hundred bucks. When Tom comes home, he doesn't quite buy the story of the Wienie King, and it leads to an argument. Gerry decides to go to Palm Beach to get a divorce. Her husband races to stop her.

Possibly the most befuddling opening credits of all time. It's just a little more befuddling than the end of the movie. This has some great eccentric characters, my favorite being the Frenchman Toto, and lots of Sturgian oddball moments, moments that would never ever happen in real life but are definitely hilarious on the screen. Snappy dialogue and a ludicrous story make this a fast-paced, fun romantic comedy. Mary Astor pops in near the end of the movie as a bazillionaire's sister and nearly steals the show. The other performances are very good, too, though McCrea, playing a straight man of a husband, is hard to notice. There's an almost stream-of-conscious style to Sturges comedies, like trains dangerously close to falling off the tracks, that makes them deliriously entertaining. They're definitely addictive. And how can you not love a movie with a Wienie King in it?

Killers from Space

1954 B-movie

Rating: 3/20

Plot: Scientist Martin is killed in an airplane accident while surveying a nuclear testing site. Shockingly, he arrives back at the base completely unharmed except for an L-shaped scar on his chest. He's given a lie detector test and tells a story about bug-eyed aliens who never blink and mutant insects and lizards that the killers from space will use to take over the world. Nobody believes him.

1950's B-movie. Aliens. Radiation. Giants. Typical stuff. This one's got a great title though! Laughably goofy no-budget stuff here with Peter Graves apparently under the impression that he's playing a statue. The aliens are really cool, all black with those gigantic eyes. A scene where Graves tries to escape from a cave and keeps running into the giant lizards, a scene which seems to last for fifteen minutes, is also great in one of those ways where you're thinking, "These special effects are terrible," followed by, "My God! This scene's been going on for fifteen minutes! What the hell? Didn't they already show that lizard twice?" followed by, "This is the greatest thing I've ever seen!" Those lizards and goo-goo-googily-eyed extra terrestrials are only in the movie for a brief middle portion of the movie; the rest of the film does drag a bit. Lame dialogue, mumbo-jumbo B-movie science, and terrible cinematography where parts are too dark to even tell what's going on and actor's faces are shown in disturbing close-ups for no apparent reason. This was a Mystery Science deal which I like because it tricks me into thinking I have friends to watch the movie with.

Attack of the 50 Foot Woman

1958 B-movie

Rating: 4/20

Plot: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Especially if alien visitation and radiation causes her to grow to a height of 50 feet. That's exactly what happens to Nancy Archer, and once titanic, she goes after her cheating husband. He's the size of a normal man.

It's gotta be one of the best movie posters of all time. Unfortunately, it's not very accurate. Less than ten percent of this movie is a gigantic woman wreaking havoc on the city, picking up cars, bustin' things up, etc. This isn't the most entertaining no-budget B-movie, but the laughable effects are fun. There's a gigantic foam hand that is used several times (for two giants) and the translucent quality of the giants certainly doesn't help matters. This was obviously made by a feminist.

Hard Eight

1996 drama

Rating: 12/20

Plot: Professional gambler Sydney is hungry, so he goes to a diner. He meets a down-and-out curly-headed guy and decides to help him. He takes the kid under his wing and becomes a father figure to him. Later, he meets a waitress and helps her out, too. The curly-headed guy and the waitress get married but during what can only be described as the worst honeymoon ever, they need Sydney's help once again. Ghosts from Sydney's past come back to haunt him and threaten the relationship he's built with the curly-headed guy.

This movie should lose a full point for having too many names as it's apparently also known as Sydney. Regardless of the title, it's a sort-of dopey, too-cool-for-its-own-good drama. I thought the performances were pretty wacky. There was something too nonchalant about Philip Baker Hall in the title role (obviously, he plays "Hard Eight"), and John C. Reilly looked out of his element. Samuel L. Jackson always borders on wacky. Gwyneth Paltrow is pretty good though. There are a lot of moments when the story drifts off course, and a twist in the film's second half really doesn't add a damn thing to the story. I hope I'm objective here. I don't want to penalize this because it doesn't come close to reaching the level that P.T. Anderson will in his later work. This should have been better, and I'm sure the director would agree. Philip Seymour Hoffman has a tiny part in this (back when he had to L's in his name), but I'm not sure whether or not it's a character winter rates would want to be.

Buster Keaton Saturday: Battling Butler + extras

1926 romantic comedy

Rating: 14/20

Plot: Alfred Butler, a pampered rich boy, decides to toughen up by living out in the wild with his valet manservant. While there, he's smitten by a wilderness girl. Her brother and uncle (dad and grandfather? cousin and brother?) rightfully suspect that he's nothing more than an effeminate weakling and do not approve. That is until they mistakenly think he's Battling Butler, a champion boxer. Alfred does nothing to convince them otherwise and eventually finds himself in a situation where he meets the real Battling Butler face to face.

This has its moments. The finale is kind of neat and the first half of the film, where Butler and his valet (played by the hilarious Snitz Edwards) "brave the elements" is pretty funny. Once Buster becomes a boxer, however, it's just not as much fun, and it leads up to a climax that is really un-Busterlike. There's a lot stretched into a full-length feature film, and there's nothing resembling a classic Buster Keaton moment here. It does have an interesting story and for the most part is paced fairly well.

I also watched "The Boat" from 1921 (not to be confused with Das Boot) and "The Frozen North" from 1922. "The Boat" is a classic and has a lot of memorable scenes. My step-father laughed uproariously at a scene involving an anchor. It's a funny little movie. "The Frozen North" is not a complete film (at least my version wasn't), but it's an odd little surreal and slightly entertaining story. Keaton is apparently parodying contemporary films with this, and I think a lot of the humor is lost without the context. There are some interesting moments though, including the strangest dogsled you'll ever see. Keaton does play a mean character in this one. He robs and kills. My original plan was to force my parents to watch "The Boat" and The Navigator, but my children turned it into an all-request Buster Keaton Saturday and we ended up watching a bunch of shorts we've previously seen.

The Third Man

1949 thriller

Rating: 20/20 (Jen: 14/20)

Plot: A pulp writer with a girl's name arrives in post-war Vienna to meet his buddy Harry Lime who has offered him a job opportunity. He's all ready to greet his friend in the traditional way ("When I open the fridge and see a Harry Lime, I throw it in the trash ha ha ha.") when he's instead greeted with the news that his friend has died. But the man with the girl's name realizes there's something amiss and runs around trying to put some pieces together. He's nearly driven insane by zither music.

This movie is flawless, a perfectly told labyrinth of a mystery. Graham Greene's script combines dry humor and tense drama while the set design, the sound (even the zither), the use of light, and the odd tilting camera angles contribute to capture an offbeat but entirely effective mood. Robert Krasker's (Academy Award winning) cinematography is as good as it gets. War-scarred black and white Vienna is beautiful. Great performances. Orson's menacing forehead nearly steals the show, but Joseph Cotton, as the poor, flawed individual who refuses to leave the web he's found himself trapped in, is also really good. This blends genres well, and all the elements add up to something that was very ahead of its time then and is still very different now.

Speedy

1928 silent comedy

Rating: 17/20

Plot: Ingeniously quick-thinking but sometimes ditzy Speedy has trouble holding down a job as his obsession with baseball frequently gets into the way of his duties. He still makes enough to take his gal to Coney Island. Meanwhile, a railroad company is trying to get rid of his girlfriend's father's horse-drawn trolley business, and Speedy is called upon to save the day.

Ok, I'm ready to admit that Harold Lloyd deserves to be mentioned in the same sentences as Buster Keaton and Charlie Chaplin. This is every bit as good (and honestly, probably better) than Safety Last!,and with the handful of other Harold Lloyd silent comedies I've seen this year, it's clear that he produced a body of work that is as consistently good as the other two. Speedy is fast-paced and a lot of fun even though it's a little choppy. It's really like two or three separate films. The first half spends a lot of time developing the characters and their relationships and has some very humorous, but subtle, sight gags and quiet comedy. The second half of the film deals with the conflict and is raucous and action-packed. There are street brawls and a chase scene that is absolutely amazing and as exciting as any chase scene I've seen in any more modern movie. Just the sheer amount of extras used for the second half of the film amazes me as tons of guys (one with a peg leg) engage in fisticuffs and hundreds of folks are forced to dodge an out-of-control trolley. The lengthy climactic chase scene is so thrilling and brilliantly photographed that I had to watch it twice. It was also neat to see 1920s New York with what seems to be miles and miles of streets and shots of Coney Island and its weird attractions. There's also a Babe Ruth cameo. This was Harold Lloyd's last silent movie, and the only 1920s movie I can remember where a character flips the bird.

In Bruges

2008 fairy tale

Rating: 15/20

Plot: Two hitmen are sent to Bruges (It's in Belgium) following a job. Ray, a greenhorn hitman, doesn't like the fairy tale Bruges while the seasoned veteran Ken digs the chance to chill and catch some sightseeing. They patiently await a call from Harry, their boss, and instructions for what to do next. Meanwhile, Ray meets a woman and a midget.

Infectiously entertaining blend of dark comedy and tense drama. The Waiting for Godot-like first third gradually introduces the town (another case where the setting adds a great texture to a film) and creates a mystery while introducing the main characters. And Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson have chemistry in which the latter becomes almost like a straight man for the former. Good comic timing there. When the film's main conflict is finally introduced, there's a great tension and some fantastic irony as all three main characters find themselves in philosophical quandaries. There's some depth to this one. Plus, there's a midget. One could accuse McDonagh of laziness, trying to get a laugh the cheap way by throwing a random midget into the proceedings, but the truth is, the midget is a really cool character and I like how he stumbles in and out of the story. The final shot is terrific though the actual resolution is a little too much like the punch line of a joke. In Bruges isn't without its problems (I thought the romantic sub-plot sort of got in the way), but it's a fantastic debut from writer/director Martin McDonagh, and I look forward to seeing more from him. Heck, I actually look forward to seeing this movie again.

This movie was recommended by three people.

The Lady Eve

1941 romantic comedy

Rating: 16/20 (Jen: 12/20)

Plot: Rich and naive Charles has just finished studying snakes in the Amazon. He meets Jean, a con-artist, on a boat and falls for her. She plays with his hair for an hour and fifteen minutes and purrs a lot. After a misunderstanding involving Charles being conned, they go their separate ways. Later, Jean comes up with a plan to annoy poor Charles again.

No surprise that this romantic comedy has crisp and snappy dialogue and more than a handful of wacky moments as that's what Sturges does. Stanwyck is great in (sort of) dual roles; she oozes a sexiness and almost everything she says is tantalizing, requiring me to watch most of this movie sans pants. I didn't care for Fonda as much. His character is too dopey, too much the schmuck, but the supporting cast is really good. The plot, at least in the second half of the movie, is also a little clunky. Still, it's a lot of fun watching this romance unfold and then struggle to survive.

An American Carol

2008 comedy

Rating: n/r

Plot: Something about terrorists hiring a Michael Moore-esque director to help them with their training videos, I think. And the Michael Moore character wants to abolish the Fourth of July. He's fat!

I lasted nearly 15 minutes before deciding that I had better things to do. I saw no laughs on the horizon. I guess "From the makers of Scary Movie 13" on the cover should have been a clue.

The Man without a Past

2002 Aki Kaurismaki movie

Rating: 16/20

Plot: Arriving in a new town, our protagonist is attacked by some thugs, beaten very badly, and robbed. He loses his memory and tries to put some kind of life together--getting a home in a sort of shanty town, repairing a juke box, finding employment, and hooking up with a Salvation Army worker.

Ho-hum. Another great Aki Kaurismaki movie. I can't quite place my finger on it, but there's something a little different about this one than the previous three I've seen this year. The pacing is the same, the camera still doesn't move, the comedy is just as dry, the romance is still quirky, the characters are still awkward, and the ending is similarly sweet, but there's something different. Nevertheless, another great one. If I could watch nothing but Aki Kaurismaki movies for an entire month, I'm not sure I'd mind. Unfortunately, I'm not sure I can even find any more.

Edvard Munch

1974 superlative film

Rating: 16/20

Plot: The life of artist Edvard Munch, from when he bled from the mouth as a child to when he got it on with a cougar to when he accidentally bought too much red paint and had to use too much of the color in his work during what later was known as his "angry red stage."

Pretty impressive multi-genre pseudo-documentary. It combines narrative, voiceover narration, diary excerpts, art critique, and (oddly) interviews in a way which succeeds in creating Munch the person and setting a context with late-19th century Europe. This is very long, maybe even too long, and definitely not for the ADD crowd. Chunks are very very slow, but I like the way the narrative swirls in and out of itself, repeating images and connecting his artwork to both his life and what was happening culturally. The scenes where Munch worked (in various styles) were really well done.

O Brother, Where Art Thou?

2000 Homer adaptation

Rating: 18/20 (Jen: 17/20)

Plot: It's a faithful adaptation of The Odyssey of Homer. In the middle of 1930s middle America, three escaped convicts (logorrheic Everett and his dopey companions Delmar and Pete) try to find their way to a treasure before the valley's flooded and said treasure is submerged at the bottom of a lake. And, of course, before the law catches up to them. Along the way, they bump into blind prophets, sirens, Babyface Nelson, prospective governors, and a cyclops.

I love everything about this movie. I love the comedy which perfectly combines brilliant performances with brilliant writing. I love the music, the timeless folk music that manages to both capture the Great Depression era and seem otherworldly. I love the Homer allusions and the nods to Hollywood screwball comedies. Most of all, I love the cinematography where the settings add so much color and become just as important as the characters. This film's got such a texture, an impossible-to-duplicate texture, that makes this a one-of-a-kind piece of filmmaking that I imagine will keep it around forever. It's got to be close to impossible to watch this movie without smiling often. It's definitely one of those movies I can watch again and again without ever getting tired of even though people watching it with me might get tired of me laughing in anticipation of certain upcoming gags. Both literary and dumb, there's enough here to appeal to nearly everybody, and it'll even teach you a few new vocabulary words. It's hard to believe that this is only the third best Coen comedy. It might have the single best Coen Brother scene, however, with that can't-believe-I'm-seeing-this KKK rally that even has a Wizard of Oz reference. Any discussion of "best movie musical ever" must include O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Short Cuts

1993 Altman movie

Rating: 17/20 (Jen: 17/20)

Plot: A loving look at the more hateful aspects of humanity in Los Angeles circa 1990. Policemen, bakers, limo drivers, waitresses, fisherman, artists, pool cleaners, night club singers, cellists, Huey Lewis, and doctors lie, cheat, manipulate, kill, cry, dance, fornicate, make accusations, earn their livings, and decay.

Jen and I are both wearing light green shirts today, too. We saw it in '93 at the theater (we're both Lyle Lovett fans), but I like it a lot more now. Great ensemble cast (not a stinker in the bunch) and their nearly-intertwining stories, despite the three hour length of this bad boy, are never even close to dull. The stories don't really begin, meander hopelessly, and then frustratingly don't have anything resembling a satisfying resolution which makes Short Cuts a unique, and arguably frustrating viewing experience. The connections between these hopeless souls are never vital, but they're nifty connections nevertheless. It's like Altman has taken fifteen different strands and tried to make a rope but ended up with something that looks more like something a kitten has coughed up. But in an artistic way. For the most part, it's a three-hour downer but with Altman almost encouraging you to laugh at the plights of these individuals. It sits the fence between misanthropy and sympathy, contempt and amusement. It's a challenging chunk of time, but the quality performances, virtuosic direction, superb script, cool music, and numerous sweet and toxic moments make it worth the effort. Powerful drama.

Mister Lonely

2007 Harmony Korine film

Rating: 13/20

Plot: A lonely Michael Jackson impersonator living in France meets a Marilyn Monroe impersonator who lives on an island with a bunch of other celebrity impersonators. Her husband is Charlie Chaplin and daughter is Shirley Temple. Also occupying the island are the Three Stooges, Sammy Davis Jr. Abraham Lincoln, James Dean, a Pope, Madonna, Queen Elizabeth, Buckwheat, and Little Red Riding Hood. Michael Jackson decides to live with them, and they work together to put on a fantastic stage show. Meanwhile, a priest in South America teaches his nuns to fly.

Well, it's Harmony Korine's best movie yet. His work is still just a little unhinged, a little uneven, a little too silly. There are large chunks of this movie and single shots that are really brilliant. It's sprinkled with great, unforgettable imagery that is either bizarrely poignant or poignantly bizarre. Korine's either got a good eye or is developing one (I can't remember Julien Donkey-Boy that well and have intentionally forgotten the dismally awful Gummo), and there are a lot of Herzogian moments in Mister Lonely. Werner himself plays the priest (he was also in Donkey-Boy, Korine and he apparently have a mutual respect for each other). There's something about watching Buckwheat giving the Pope a bath or the Three Stooges shooting sheep that is endlessly entertaining. And most of the scenes with the nuns are really beautiful. But just like Gummo, this sort of has that weird for the sake of weird thing that makes it seem more masturbatory than artistic. If I could figure out what it all adds up to, I think I'd like it a lot more, but I'm not really convinced it even adds up to anything at all. Lots to like--the raw originality, the odd beauty, some great music--but it's just not enough. Channel it, Harmony!