Suggested by Josh and probably inspired by my relationship with an imaginary friend named Chauncey Decoupage, here are the top ten imaginary friends in movies. Whether or not some of these are truly imaginary could be argued, and you should feel free to make that argument in the comments.
Lots of spoilers below.
Top Ten Imaginary Friends in Movies
Number 14: Francois Dillinger, Youth in Revolt
I just saw this movie as part of my research for this blog post, so don't you say I don't put in the time for this thing. I prefer imaginary friends (more an alter-ego here) who are bad influences, I think, and Francois--Michael Cera with a mustache and cigarette--ends up getting Nick--Michael Cera with no mustache or cigarette--in a lot of trouble. I can barely contain my excitement when there's one Michael Cera on the screen. Try imagining what happens when there are two of them, especially when one of them gets a line like "I want to tickle your bellybutton. . .from the inside." ! That's Michael Ceralicious!
Number 13: Mickey Goldmill, Rocky V
Now it's entirely possible that I'm misinterpreting Rocky V and that Burgess Meredith wasn't actually a imagined zombie version of the titular boxer's trainer. However, that's the interpretation that makes me the happiest, and one could probably argue that all the characters in the Rocky franchise--at least Rocky's II-IX--are just figments of the brain-damaged boxer's imagination. Dude's swinging at specters and shadows with only a zombified Mickey telling him, "Get up, you son of a bitch, because Mickey loves ya," to keep him going. Mr. T, Talia Shire, and Drago are great imaginary friends and fiends, but Mickey was my favorite character from those movies so I'll go with him.
Number 12: Gusteau, Ratatouille
A portly French ghost chef who talks to a rat? What's not to like? This is an inspirational imaginary friend, one who helps the protagonist realize his dreams and become who he is supposed to be. Arguably, he's got ulterior motives, but I won't let that stand in my way. I mean, he gets so many great little inspirational snippets, things that you could easily put on a poster and hang in your gym to keep you going when you're training to fight a Russian guy. Oh, sorry. Wrong movie. "If you focus on what you left behind, you'll never see what lies ahead." "You must try things that may not work, and you must not let anyone define your limits because of where you come from." "Your only limit is your soul." "There is excellence all around you. You need only to be aware to stop and savor it." That's good stuff, and Ratatouille is good stuff, a sort-of overlooked Pixar classic.
Number 11: Gooby from Gooby
I thought about just including Gooby with the assortment of figments in The Shining (see below), but I had to give him his own spot because he gets his own movie. As far as I can remember, this is the only imaginary friend who farts and then uses his hand to waft it in the direction of the person imagining him. And that's worth something, readers. We'll definitely throw Gooby in the mischief-making imaginary friend category. And we can blame him for what ended up being a really terrible movie. Here's another picture of him:
Obviously, using Gooby is just an excuse to throw that picture from The Shining on my blog again. Please don't hold that against me.
Number 10: Mugwump, Naked Lunch
And there's a picture of William S. Burroughs shaking hands with a Mugwump. Sometimes, our imaginary friends represent our obsessions, and this alien-reptile guy definitely does that as William Lee begins imagining it after too much exposure to bug powder. When you've got the combined imaginative powers of Burroughs and David Cronenberg designing your imaginary friend, you know you're in for something unique, and the Mugwump doesn't disappoint. The thing gives solid advice, too: "Homosexuality is the best all-around cover an agent ever had." If I had a nickel for every time that helped me out of a jam!
And remember, Mugwump jism can't be beat.
Number 9: Ivan, The Machinist
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I don't think this even qualifies as a spoiler since it's pretty obvious this dude's not real from the get-go. As a sinister side to Christian Bale's Trevor, Ivan is one of the coolest imaginary sidekicks on the list. This is another movie I watched solely for the benefit of this top-ten list, and I'm really glad I did because I loved it. But that thick southern accent, those goggles, that giant bald head, those boots, that smile, that cut-throat gesture. Ivan's the menacing daydream of a damaged mind. Creating an imaginary friend who becomes the main character's antagonist is a neat idea but nothing special. Transforming that imaginary friend into the character's savior, however? That's pretty cool.
Number 8: Humphrey Bogart, Play It Again, Sam
You know how much easier my life would have been if I had Humphrey Bogart as an imaginary friend to give me advice? At the very least, I would have used the word "dame" more. Also, I would have understood how dames understand a good slap in the mouth or a slug from a .45 much earlier in life. Jerry Lacy's Bogart in this is just good enough, and Allen uses the character to humorously allude to Casablanca and pay tribute to the late actor.
Number 7: Mother Bates, Psycho
"A boy's best friend is his mother." The only thing worse, according to Freud, than having an imaginary friend who is your own mother? Having an imaginary friend who is a cigar. Ah, maybe the best imaginary friends are the ones that are obviously products of diseased minds. And not many minds are more diseased that that of Master Bates. So diseased that the dude becomes both his own imaginary friend and his own mother simultaneously. And you have to love when a character's invented an imaginary friend who criticizes him so sharply or argues about having to stay in the cellar. Perhaps that's the difference between healthy and unhealthy minds. Healthy minds invent pleasant imaginary friends. Unhealthy ones invent argumentative ones who kill women in showers.
Number 6: Captain Howdy, The Exorcist
Maybe it's just that this one's fresh on the mind. Or that his name is Captain Howdy. More likely, it's the voice work of Mercedes McCambridge and all the fun Captain Howdy and Linda Blair have in this movie. Captain Howdy is not a good influence on that poor girl, but their exploits help create some of the funniest scenes in the history of horror movies. Just imagine Captain Howdy returning and reminiscing with Linda Blair. "Hey, remember when you were a kid and you violated yourself with a crucifix." "Oh, Captain Howdy, you are such a motherfucker!" This one's definitely not the most pleasant imaginary friend, but in small doses, he could be the life of your own little personal party.
Number 5: Elliott, Pete's Dragon
It's been a while, but I believe this is the only imaginary friend on the list who has a sexual relationship with the person imagining him. Well, I guess we don't really know what's going on with Norman Bates, do we? And you never know what's going on with Gooby. And no, it's not on-screen, you sicko, but there's definitely a pedophilia subtext with this one, isn't there? Watch this thing again and tell me it's not there. And just look at Elliott. If that purple coiffure isn't pedophile hair, I really don't know what is. On the surface, this dragon is the imaginary friend every kid would love to have. If you ignore the more sinister aspects of this Disney mix of live-action and animation, you've got yourself a sweet relationship. But I can't pretend that subtext isn't there which keeps this away from the top spot.
Number 4: Grandpa Seth, Troll 2
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"I had an imaginary friend when I was young. But it wasn't your dead grandpa!"
Oh, Grandpa Seth. The only imaginary friend I've got on my list who wears suspenders. An imaginary friend who can help you understand the powers of a double decker bologna sandwich. An imaginary friend who can persuade a kid to piss on hospitality. A lot of the magic of this imaginary friend is the great acting by Robert Ormsby in his only role, and a lot of it is the poetry of Claudio Fragasso's script. And it's just refreshing to know that no matter how bad a situation, how terrible your own personal Nilbogs can become, there's always a Grandpa Seth out there ready to help you through your troubles.
Number 3: Tony, The Shining
Maybe it's lame when your imaginary friend is your own finger. I don't know anymore. All I do know is that when I was a kid, I carried around a stuffed Sugar Bear, the mascot from the Super Golden Crisp cereal or whatever that was called. And he spoke to me, friends, giving me advice throughout high school about life and women that wasn't nearly as valuable as advice given by Bogart or a mustachioed Michael Cera. Or even a Captain Howdy. But the voice this little Sugar Bear had, believe it or not, was the same voice that Danny used for Tony. The Shining is actually filled with imaginary friends, and I could have easily picked Lloyd the bartender or Scatman Crothers. Oh, wait. Scatman Crothers' character was real. Or was he? Doesn't matter. Tony the finger is the imaginary friend I most identify with which earns him the number 3 spot.
Number 2: Tyler Durden, Fight Club
Well, this one's obvious, but I love the movie and I love the character that Brad Pitt was seemingly born to play. And you've seen Tyler Durden without a shirt, right? That's all you need right there, isn't it? You know Norman Bates would agree with me. Tyler Durden is that little voice in a lot of our heads that tries to get us to break stuff, sometimes ourselves. He's the little devil sitting on our shoulders, but sometimes--sometimes--that little devil is right. As mischievous as imaginary friends come, Durden's both cool and trouble incarnate, the perfect foil for Norton's character. And this imaginary friend gives us such a terrific movie twist. Such a memorable imaginary friend!
Number 1: Harvey, Harvey
And no, I'm not talking about that hideous thing in Donnie Darko, a movie I don't really remember. I'm talking about the original imaginary rabbit friend of Jimmy Stewart. I haven't seen this in a while, but it reminds me of a movie idea I had a long time ago, a movie about a rabbit who has an invisible Jimmy Stewart as an imaginary friend. Harvey's probably the quintessential imaginary friend, isn't he? Another obvious choice, but he deserves the top spot here even if we don't get to see him. Maybe it's because of how Jimmy Stewart says "Harvey" in this. And I know what I just said about Pete's Dragon, but is the relationship in this one sexual, too? I can't remember.
Here are some imaginary friends I left out:
Elvis in True Romance
Charles in A Beautiful Mind (probably worthy of making the list, but I don't remember the movie well enough)
E.T. in E.T.
The titular girl in Lars and the Real Girl
Mel Gibson's beaver puppet in Beaver
That creepy kid in The Orphanage
Noah's friend in Aronofsky's Noah
The Great Gazoo in the Flintstones sequel where they go to Rock Vegas
Fred in Drop Dead Fred (haven't seen this in a really long time, but he seems like an obvious choice)
Wilson, Tom Hanks' pal in Cast Away
Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense
The mannequin in Mannequin
Fozzie Bear's Mr. Bimble, a cute little Shining reference in Muppet's Treasure Island
Snuffleupagus in Follow That Bird
And I wanted to fit Ferris Bueller in because I like that theory about the character being Cameron's imaginary friend so much. I just don't buy the theory unfortunately.
So, who did I miss?
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