The Fanatic

2019 thriller

Rating: 4/20

Plot: A developmentally-challenged cinephile stalks an action star.

1) Redbox Entertainment--I should have known I was in trouble from the get-go.

2) "Moose is in the house!" Moose indeed is in the house, and John Travolta's lost his mind. He's got a haircut that is capable of doing all the acting for him, but he turns it to 11 anyway. "I can't talk long. I've gotta poo." That's one of his first lines, so the screenplay definitely isn't doing him favors here, but it was still his decision to be in this movie and play the titular fanatic like he plays him. I mean, I assume this was a lot of his creation. Fred Durst isn't going to tell John Travolta to stop doing a character a certain way, right?

3) That's right--Fred Durst directed this. As I said, I should have known I was in trouble before Travolta tells us he's got to poo.

4) Just think about how big of a gap there is between the opening shots in Travolta's break-out performance and the opening of this one when he says, "I can't talk long. I've gotta poo." He's cooler than cool, and you can tell by the way he walks his walk in the 70s. In 2019, he's gotta poo.

5) Whether you want to blame Durst or Travolta or the hellish combination of the two, it's hard not to see "Moose" as an offensive character. Travolta plays up the mannerisms for comic effect, a character obviously on the spectrum who I think we're supposed to laugh at more than sympathize with. His disability--whatever that might be--is the source of his conflict here. I don't want to spoil anything, so I'll put this vaguely, but his disability is what leads to what you could describe as a downfall here, and it's almost cruel what Durst and Travolta are doing here.

6) More offensive is a scene where the action star (never caught his name, but he's played with a little bit of irony or satire by Devon Sawa) is in a car with his son and plays Limp Bizkit. "You like a little Bizkit?" I don't care how desperate I am as an actor or how much I need the work. I see that line in a script, and I'm walking.

7) There's Vis-a-Vis markers product placement in this as well.

8) Durst isn't seasoned enough as a filmmaker to realize that alluding to a lot of better movies is just going to make me realize how bad the movie I'm watching really is. The best reference--a "blink and you miss it" type of reference--is when Moose is looking at a Star Maps app on his phone and sees the address of Jack Torrance. For a brief moment, I thought that was clever, but then I remembered I was watching a movie from the guy in Limp Bizkit and realized that it was the opposite of clever. Other references: the "Stuck in the Middle" scene from Reservoir Dogs, a reference that almost seems blasphemous now that I think about it) and some ramblings about how Louise Fletcher isn't a good nurse. I'm embarrassed for those movies having to be in some IMDb trivia page for this movie.

9) Travolta does get a nice moment where he plays a piano and sings bits and pieces of "Great Balls of Fire." And by "nice moment," I mean that it's awful and embarrassing.

10) This has a few tense moments, but they're only tense because of what is happening. It seems like Durst and Travolta are doing everything they can to deflate them.

11) Ummm...the maid? What the hell? If you have seen this, maybe you can help me clear up something about the timeline of this narrative. Also, if you frequent Hollywood, maybe you can tell me if "Cereal Man" is real.

12) Best moment in the movie: John Travolta smelling his finger after touching his stalkee's ear.

13) Oh, sorry. He's not a stalker! He's not a stalker!

14) Durst tried to give this a neo-noir flavor by adding some narration. That's provided by Moose's friend. Unfortunately, the narrated lines she's given are maybe worse than the dialogue. "Moose didn't just cross the line. He fucking nuked it." That's the exact kind of line you'd expect from somebody who was in Limp Bizkit, I guess.

15) I hope Fred Durst doesn't read this and decide he wants to fight me. Or stand outside my door with a boombox and play Limp Bizkit.

16) Credit has to go to Travolta because I think he's doing his own moped stunts in this.

17) I can't type anymore. I gotta poo.