I Hired a Contract Killer

1990 Aki Kaurismaki black comedy

Rating: 16/20

Plot: A depressed Frenchman in England decides to end it all after he loses his job and is given a watch that doesn't work. He's apparently not very good at that either and hires the titular killer to do the job for him. Soon after, he meets a woman selling roses at a pub, falls in love with her eyes, and changes his mind. The contract killer, however, is relentless.

This story might not be completely original, but the execution is undeniably Kaurismakian. Sometimes Kaurismaki's camera doesn't move at all. Here, it does, but predictably, there's nothing at all flamboyant about this, and the pacing and dark and deadpan humor are as reminiscent as Jarmusch as ever. This one is in English although Jean-Pierre Leaud's English is a little on the broken side, and that might make it the most accessible Kaurismaki that I've got on my blog. I could throw some of the dialogue on here, but it's not going to mean much without the context and delivery of the actors. But I'll do it anyway. I liked these two a lot:

Henri: It doesn't work--thees watch.
Secretary: Yes. It does.

Margaret: Why did you leave France, Henri?
Henri: Said the don't like me there. (At least I think that's what he said. His accent is pretty thick.)

See? I told you that wouldn't work. This isn't going to be laugh-out-loud comedy for most people, but I did laugh at Leaud's "Where I come from we eat places like this for breakfast!" attempt at tough-guy during one scene. And this little screw hook thing he puts into a wall during his first suicide attempt--should that have made me laugh? Leaud, the kid in The 400 Blows, is funny here although like most Kaurismaki actors, he doesn't really look like he belongs as the hero in a movie. Margi Clarke is entirely devoid of personality although she does have a pair of eyes, but that lack of personality, in a way, makes the whole relationship even funnier. I liked Kenneth Colley as the killer. He's menacing enough, and this movie does get its share of suspenseful moments, too. The first attempt on Henri's life, a scene surrounded by footsteps, is really good, and a just-missed encounter also worked well. Unlike a lot of Kaurismaki's movies, this doesn't take place in Finland, but he still found locations like you'd typically see in his movies--a doctor's office with "Surgery" on a the storefront on a street littered with trash bags, Vic's French Hamburgers with a cemetery in the back. All in all, it's another winner from one of my favorite directors!