Bad Movie Club: The Nasty Rabbit
1964 spy comedy
Rating: 4/20 (Fred: 8/20; Josh: 4/20; Jeremy: 4/20; Libby: fell asleep)
Plot: Russians release a nasty rabbit somewhere near Idaho in order to unleash a bacteria which will destroy America! Spies from various countries and a wannabe heartthrob pop star try to stop the Soviet's number one spy before it's too late.
We begin with a scene that I can only imagine was filmed in a real submarine, probably because the splashing sound effects sounded so real. It was the first of a glut of sound effects that gradually wore fragments of my skull and started poking at my brain. This movie is corny on the surface, but beneath its epidermis is something more sinister--a seeming effort to assault the senses of the audience. It's a terrorist assault, a movie that hurt your eyes, then hurt your ears, and then scorched the hairs in your nostrils. That's right--it's a movie you swore you could smell by the end of it. Don't get me wrong. This is an enjoyable bad movie. Something as dated as thirty-year-old caramel corn has to have some entertainment value, but if this had gone on any longer and if I had watched it alone, I more than likely would have gone insane. Random sound effects and musical snippets--slide whistles, old-time car horns, springs, the freakin' "William Tell Overture," somebody banging their head on a kitchen sink, etc.--gave this a low-budget surreal flavor, and by the time the characters were Benny Hill-ized (Benny Hill-ated?) for a climactic chase sequence that looked about as dangerous as anything you're likely to see in a movie from any decade, it all made perfect sense. This also stands out because of some in-your-face racial stereotyping. There's a Mexican spy, for example. And just as you'd expect from a five-year-old who wrote and directed this movie after binge-watching Looney Tunes cartoons, he's got a giant sombrero and a mustache. Oh, and his name's Pancho Gonzalez, of course. There's a Japanese guy who keeps falling out of a tree. There's a German guy who throws out Nazi salutes and is brutish because that's how all German guys act. There's Liz Raney, who allegedly financed most of this, who plays a whorish Italian or French woman. Or who knows, maybe she's both. And there's a little person playing a Jewish guy named Maxwell Stoppie. He spends a lot of the movie inside a television, and there's one incredible stunt where he plants his face in the German guy's crotch. That's called Initiating a Teabag where I come from. Arch Hall Jr., son of Arch Hall Sr., is the real hero because he's white and knows exactly what to do with a guitar. This was written by Hall Sr. as yet another attempt to make his son into a star. Hall Jr. was also in the wonderfully bad Eegah which featured Richard Kiel, and Richard Kiel is in this one, too. A guy named Ray Vegas plays the Mexican spy, and a couple named Lolly and Pat Vegas wrote the songs in this. I assume they're related which makes this whole thing a family affair. A dysfunctional family affair. Anyway, I found the entire thing enormously entertaining and a great way to celebrate Easter since it did have a talking rabbit in it. Oh, I didn't mention that the rabbit talked? Yeah, he gets some hilarious quips where he breaks the fourth wall, like when he wonders if John Wayne had to go through all of this to become a star. Hilarious. One more thing I want to mention--the opening credits. They used wooden cut-outs of bunnies for them which was low-budget genius.
Also known as Spies-a-Go-Go.
Random, out-of-context comments from Bad Movie Clubbers, some which could and should be used on teh packaging for the next dvd release of this movie:
Libby: "Should we be smoking weed for this?" (Answer: Probably.)
Josh: "Oh shit it talks!" (Maybe I should have put a [Spoiler Alert] up there before giving away that the titular rabbit talks. If you know that going in, you won't have the same feeling in your crotch that we had in our crotches when that rabbit talked for the first time.)
Fred: "Why is every stereotype watching him land?"
Jeremy: "If they use ALL of the stereotypes, it makes it ok."
Josh: "This music is schizophrenic."
Libby: "Pretty sure I saw Elmer Fudd and Speedy Gonzalez."
Me: "Weirdest propaganda I've ever seen."
Josh: "Laughing Moose O'Brien." (This is the name the best spy in Russia gave himself to blend in with the cowboys at the jamboree or wherever the hell he was at. He said the line, "Laughing Moose O'Brien. That's me. I'm a cowboy from Montana, Oklahoma." And that tells you everything you need to know about the brand of humor this movie has.)
Me: "Bunny eating sound effects! Man, if this didn't win an Academy Award for sound, it's a travesty [sic]."
Fred: "This might be the most culturally offensive BMC yet. Even topping Big Money Rustlas."
Jeremy: "I can't imagine why they have another half hour of this stuff."
Me: "Whoa. I did not see that twist coming. Nor did I understand it." (The ending of this is something. The thing just begs for a sequel, but I'm sure Arch Hall Jr. is too old for this shit now. Maybe Arch Hall the Third though?)
Josh: "I was digging for my cyanide capsule."
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