Bad Movie Club: Hawkeye
1988 buddy cop movie
Bad Movie Rating: 4/5 (Fred: 2/5, but didn't finish; Kristen: 3/5; Jeremy: 4/5; Kandi (BMC rookie who does not officially want to be associated with our group in any way): No rating, but "probably the worst movie I've ever seen"; Josh: fell asleep; Johnny: 4.5/5)
Plot: Alexander "Hawkeye" Hawkamoto, a cop willing to break all the rules to get his man, loses a partner and gains another, a guy cast in the movie because he might remind people of Eddie Murphy. Together, they try to take down some drug dealers in Las Vegas.
Don't be fooled, Ronnie Lott fans. He doesn't even get two minutes of screen time here, so if you pick this up at your local Blockbuster Video because you see him advertised on the cover up there, you're going to be disappointed.
God bless George Chung who wrote, directed, and starred in this, ostensibly because he wanted to prove to the world that he could be an action superstar. And if you just watch the guy die and roll to dodge bullets--something he does at least twice here--you'll be sold. For an Asian character from Texas, you'd think he'd stay away from racism, but that's clearly not the case with a ill-advised watermelon reference in this script. Chung has no business being in an action movie or really any kind of movie. I mean, just look at the guy:
I'm not sure who the actor was playing my favorite character, but I think it might be Jack Wada as "karate master." Kristen astutely pointed out that the guy sounded like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory, and his two scenes in this are definitely stand-outs.
This is as poorly written as you'd imagine, at times seeming like Chung doesn't have a full grasp on the idioms of the English language. That would be the only explanation for the "packing shit" line that pops up in there. Of course, there was an entire scene, one of many extraneous ones near the middle of the movie that failed to advance the plot or reveal anything about the characters, that takes place at a gay bar, apparently for comic relief reasons. References to "pissing in the rain" or "pouring the meat to her" also perplexed.
The movie has a great ending, and I wish it had two or three sequels. I'd love to see the further adventures of Alexander Hawkamoto.