Space Master X-7

1958 sci-fi

Rating: 10/20

Plot: "Satellite terror strikes the earth" when a deadly space fungus is brought back to our planet. A scientist investigates the fungus, dubs it "blood rust," and then dies. Suddenly, a woman hunt is on as the authorities search for the scientist's ex-wife Laura who was visiting so that this movie could have a plot.

A couple sidebars:

1) Moe Howard is in this. He plays a taxi driver. I couldn't find any other Stooges.

2) Paul Frees plays the scientist. He was Dr. Vorhees in The Thing from Another World, but is mostly known for a ton of voice work including a bunch of things I watched as a child. He was Burgermeister Meisterburger! And the Ghost Host in Disneyworld's Haunted Mansion ride! And he did voice work for The Abominable Dr. Phibes. He also did "various voices" for the Jackson Five cartoon. From the credits, it actually seems like he did every voice on the show that wasn't a Jackson brother.

The worst thing about this movie is something that is quickly turning into a movie pet peeve for me--unnecessary or oppressive narration. This story is told by a senator, and his all-too-frequent narration just gets in the way. It's lazy storytelling. There's really not much to the weirdly named Space Master X-7 although it's actually got a pretty cool story. I like the noirish hunt for Laura. She thinks she's wanted in a murder investigation, and there's a nifty race against the clock as they try to find her before "Blood Rust" kills everybody. Unfortunately, there's not really a movie to go along with that story. There's not anything blatantly awful about the movie. This isn't bad enough to be an entertaining bad movie. The acting's fine, the writing's fine, the minimal use of special effects (the expanding fungus thing) is fine, the camera work is fine. In fact, Space Master X-7 just might be the most fine movie I've seen all year. But it's the same kind of "fine" that I am whenever somebody asks me how I'm doing. "How are you today, Shane?" I'll always answer "Fine" even when I'm smart enough to know that times are dark and getting darker and I'm more depressed than I was the last time the same person asked me how I was doing when I was really depressed. So, if a person I barely know and probably wouldn't want to see asked me, "Hey, Shane, how's Space Master X-7?" I would answer "Fine" but really not mean it. Recommended only to Three Stooges completists.