Bride of the Monster

1955 horror movie

Rating: 6/20

Plot: Dr. Eric Varnoff, expelled from his own homeland, experiments with radiation in order to create a race of superhumans who will do his bidding. He's got rotund Lobo and a rubber octopus to help him with his evil plans. A newspaper reporter tries to uncover his secrets.

There's a lot wrong with this movie. There's typically Woodian embarrassing writing, a lack of variety in the sets, and some really goofy special-ed effects. The much-maligned rubber octopus really is ridiculous. At one point in the movie, a guy falls on top of the octopus and sort of flails around, occasionally picking up a tentacle himself to simulate an attack. Then he actually gets up for a little bit only to fall down on top of the octopus again. The story's ludicrous, just barely making enough sense to qualify as a plot. However, Wood-regular Tor Johnson is a menacing presence, and Bela Lugosi, in his final speaking role, is brilliant. His performance alternates between creepy and powerful and strangely touching. He should have won an Academy Award for this. It's his performance that actually makes this a real movie. No, it's not enough of a real movie to fool anybody into thinking it's actually good. People are still only going to enjoy this because of the complete ineptitude, but it's not nearly the travesty that some of Wood's other movies are.

Killer octopus! Oh, no! I just picked up its tentacle and put it on top of myself again! Somebody help me!

No comments: