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1984 science fiction movie
Rating: 10/20
Plot: A duke is sent to a desert planet with a valuable spice and sand worms in order to do something that something that is probably important but that I can't quite recall right now. But it was a trap, and the duke's assassinated. The kid, who does not drink coffee, wants revenge, and he's the chosen one or something because that's the type of story this is.
This is a really expensive B-movie. B-movie plot, B-movie characters, B-movie fight scenes, B-movie acting. If it wasn't for the impressive array of eyebrows, some really creative set design, and some interesting effects, this wouldn't be worth watching at all. Unless you happen to be a fan of Sting's futuristic underpants.
With undergarments like that, it's easy to understand why this guy can have sex for 72 hours straight.
I watched to reacquaint myself in preparation for the Jodorowsky documentary, but I'm not sure it matters as I found large chunks of this almost entirely incoherent. And as good as the visuals were in spots, special effects were often sketchy. Arguably, Lynch does better with this sci-fi action stuff that you'd expect. Other than some weirdness, some gross-out imagery, and Lynch regulars like Nance, MacLachlan, and Dourif, there's really not much you'd describe as Lynchian here. Oh, well there are some sludgy dream sequences. The pacing is stuffy, and the whole thing ends up landing somewhere in between an interesting artistic failure and something that is just mind-numbingly dull. I did enjoy some of the score--Toto and Brian Eno, I guess--and the brain fish man in the giant black toaster. I also liked exactly two characters--Dourif's guy with the comically-large eyebrows and Kenneth McMillan's festering Baron Vladimir Harkonnen, although the latter's ability to float around was a little goofy. My biggest gripe was the amount of internal monologue going on in this. I got so sick of hearing characters flatly delivering their thoughts, especially since I wasn't smart enough to even know what was going on anyway.
My history with this movie: I saw this at my dad's house when I was a kid and didn't understand it and thought it was boring. So, the same sort of experience I had this time around. I thought the whole thing was like a non-fun Star Wars. And then somebody bought me a board game which my brother and I really liked. It seems there are multiple versions of this game because a Google Image search turns up a lot of things I don't recognize. This is the one I had:
Anyway, I'm ready to watch Jodorowsky's Dune now to see how much better that would have been than Lynch's version.
In the future, we'll all have eyebrows like this:
Or this:
It's part of the evolutionary process. Keeps the sand worms away.
5 comments:
i think all the board games are the same. we just had the movie version. i think you are doing your readers a disservice. you are better at most silly games we created(one bounce volleyball) and almost all board games, but i was master of this and mancala.
i saw this when it came out with my mother her boyfriend and his young daughter. my mom turned to me and whispered, "i'm sorry" a dozen times.
i like the book though have not enjoyed any of the film or tv versions. the film is long but feels rushed because there is so much in the book to cover, so this would be confusing to someone who has not read the book. the politically intriques and what not. i liked a lot of the costumes and set design a lot. maybe a 12.
Yeah, I know you were better at this board game. I figured throwing that in there was a cheap way to ensure I'd get a comment. And Mancala! Damn! I never figured that game out. I just couldn't figure out any strategy there. I think I was thrown off by the math.
Kenneth McMillan was one of my favorite character actors. He always put his all into a scene, and I think his delivery was always interesting and engaging.
I don't think I know him from anything but this. I've seen movies he's been in (looked him up), but I don't remember who he would have been. I do like the character in this though. He's one of the best things about the movie!
I always liked his dramatic stuff, but he really had a great comic delivery. In "Armed & Dangerous," he always cracks me up with this line which he delivers with a stone face as if giving sage advice: "The world is a shithole, full of shity little scumbags, who are scared shitless."
In "Three Fugitives," he plays an old vet who has lost his mind and ends up treating convict-on-the-loose Nic Nolte -- the joke is he thinks Nolte is a dog the entire time...great gag pulled off by McMillan.
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