Medicine Man

1992 movie

Rating: 8/20

Plot: Dr. Robert Campbell, sporting a ponytail because he's the type of doctor who doesn't play by the rules, is researching in the Amazon. He believes he's found a cure for cancer. Dr. Rae Crane, possibly the most annoying woman on earth, arrives to assist him, and Campbell tries to figure out a way to get cancer so that he can avoid being around her much longer.

This movie might be worse than cancer. Lorraine Bracco. I couldn't tell if her character was irritating or if her acting was irritating or if it was an unholy combination of both of those, but I haven't been this annoyed by a character since watching Willie in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Sean Connery is playing pretty much the same guy he plays in every movie except he's got the ponytail in this one. His gruffness or misogyny or whatever you want to call it seems manufactured or heavily scripted. And that gruffness or misogyny or whatever you want to call it makes the developing relationship between the two main characters completely improbable. This movie might have broken a record for me losing interest in what's going on. I lost track about three and a half minutes in, said, "Ah, screw it. Maybe some exciting stuff will end up happening. . .or maybe Shooby Leboof will pop up later one!" and then sat in bored confusion for almost two hours. And how am I rewarded for my efforts? Treacle in the hair! I guess I now know why I'd never heard of this movie. There are a lot of images of barely-dressed native peoples if that's your bag.

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