Bad Movie Club: Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life


2005 Lifetime movie

Bad Movie Rating: 3/5 (Josh: 3/5; Samantha: 3/5; Mark: 3/5, Melissa: no rating [didn't last even as long as the movie's young protagonist would have had he engaged in actual intercourse])

Rating: 5/20

Plot: A high school kid's life spirals out of control when he becomes addicted to Internet soft-core pornography and forgets how to use doors. 

According to imdb's trivia page for this movie: One of the "porn" sites the main character in this looks at is called Naked Women with No Clothes On. I didn't catch that myself.

Bad Movie Club had never ventured into the dark world of Lifetime movies. As a made-for-TV venture, the possibilities of a wild masturbation sequence were severely limited. And, apparently, the "porn" websites were limited to things like Naked Women with No Clothes On. This was sort of like a Reefer Madness for Internet porn addiction, and the unbelievable downward spiral of this kid was probably a little more entertaining than it should have been. I did enjoy that his chosen Internet moniker was "Stroke Man." It was actually a reference to his swimming, but we all know it was the makers of this getting a way with a sneaky masturbation reference. Or maybe it's not even sneaky. 

My reference to doors in my plot synopsis? It might be my favorite thing about this movie actually. The kid never closes his door. He'll be in the room checking out Naked Women with No Clothes On, and his mom or younger brother--future self-abuser--will walk by and see his computer screen. If you're going to look at pornography, at least close the door! 

Kelly Lynch plays a MILF. 

I bet Mike Pence would love this movie. 

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