Jennifer's Birthday Movie Celebration: First Blood

1982 action movie

Rating: 14/20

Plot: A Vietnam War veteran travels to Oregon to visit a friend and finds that he's not as alive as he used to be. While looking for a place to eat, he's bullied by a brutish sheriff and eventually arrested for, I think, having a flag on his jacket. He escapes and retreats to the woods where he's hunted by some police officers who haven't realized what a badass he is.

Seriously, what's wrong with having a flag on your jacket? That's what seems to bug Dennehy initially although that character was probably just looking for an excuse to screw with Rambo. And I think that's the lesson here--you don't screw with the mentally ill. Cause if you do, you'll end up with a knife against your throat or your gas stations on fire. I don't know what to make of Stallone's performance here. The performance is fine for this sort of action/adventure thing, and Stallone, as evidenced in Rocky, can pull off mentally challenged very well. He does a lot of grunting in this movie and really seems more animal than human, something I probably already suspected anyway. He's physically perfect, and the action scenes in the forest with ubiquitous Rambo injuring the silver-hatted (or was the color messed up on my television?) cops are great in the way they build suspense. An earlier escape scene's fights are lame by comparison with cops who don't flail very well, especially goofy David Caruso who can't even get kneed in the junk right. When Stallone actually has to act like a human being, he's less realistic, and the dialogue ending with "I can't find your legs" made me laugh, probably inappropriately. The smaller roles are played laughably. Jack Starrett as Galt makes a run at Silliest Actor in First Blood early with the delivery of "If you don't fly this thing right, I swear I'm gonna kill you" but then you've got John McLiam (Boss Keen in Cool Hand Luke) as "Orvil, Guy with Dogs" who's got a voice like a Dukes of Hazzard extra. Leroy the painter, by the way, would easily win Silliest Actor in First Blood but it's an uncredited performance which unfortunately makes him ineligible. Both of the hunters are pretty bad, too. "What happened, son?" "I see him over there!" I think these guys must have been related to Ted Kotcheff or something. But there are good performances as well. Richard Crenna was born to say "To eat things that would make a billy goat puke" and is the perfect Trautman in this, and Brian Dennehy is always entertaining. And some guy named Dan Hill should receive a lifetime ban from recording studios for that "It's a Long Road" song that plays during the credits. I'd rather piss off Rambo than have to hear that again.

This was watched in honor of Jen's birthday. She's got a thing for Brian Dennehy.

4 comments:

cory said...

Have her watch a film called "Gorky Park" for a Dennehy fix.

As I age, I see this more as the exploitation flick that it truly is. It pretends to have depth, but really it's just an excuse to manipulate the audience into pulling for a badass to get righteous vengeance on pretty much everyone in sight. That said, Stallone is the perfect badass. He's ripped, he sweats, he bleeds. He gets hurt, and then he dishes the hurt. What I really appreciate is the amount of effort and semi-realism that goes into the action. This is the first anti-hero action film that goes this graffic, and that makes it pretty entertaining in a caveman kind of way. My brain tells me "First Blood" is wrong, but my id gives it a 17.

l@rstonovich said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
l@rstonovich said...

This was a religion when I was I a kid. I followed this religion until I heard the Dead Kennedys in 8th grade.

Where's Jen's b-day rating. btw, I haven't read yr review yet.

Shane said...

She didn't watch Rambo with me. She would have fallen asleep anyway. There were a couple lies in this write-up: 1) Jen's birthday is actually in April. 2) Jen has no interest in Brian Dennehy. Other than that, this is 100% reliable.